بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
I have made a firm resolve this year. Insha’Allah, I will strive to migrate away from a very despicable habit. It is a habit that is not only harmful in the dunya but is also extremely fatal for Akhirah (Hereafter). It is that of back biting and/or of gossip of any sort.
Unfortunately, some sins have become so common today that we have become desensitized to them. They have become a part and parcel of our lives, and it really seems impossible to completely eliminate them.
However, by virtue of the Furqan (ability to judge between right and wrong) that Qur’an gives us, we begin feeling guilty as step number one after doing an action that we know will displease Allah (سبحانه و تعالى). With the Furqan within, every time something wrong is done or said, there is a restlessness and a nagging within. This restlessness is what will eventually, and sooner than later, translate into stopping us from sin. To feel guilty over a sin is also from the taufeeq (ability) of Allah (سبحانه و تعالى)and one must be thankful to Him for it since there are several of us who sin on a daily basis, yet do not consider it as wrong and furthermore seek no repentance for it.
Gossiping or backbiting is not just a huge part of our daily conversation; rather, it is virtually the conversation itself. It seems that we would not have anything to talk about if we don’t talk about others’ lives, shortcoming so on and so forth.
As I thought of the concept of migration, I had to decide on one migration that I would make on a personal level in light of my deen (religion) to please Allah (سبحانه و تعالى). I decided I am going to aim to stay away from this very pathetic disease that has plagued my entire life and my conversations.
Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) says in the Qur’an:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَّحِيمٌ
“O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.”
[Al-Qur’an – Surat Al-Hujurat: 12]
There are many worldly repercussions of this habit in addition to the punishment in the hereafter. It spreads negativity, incorrect information and even defamation. It causes rifts and disagreements amongst close relations and friends. At times it can cause alot of embarrassment and shame too. Hence, it is a win-win situation to try and stay away from this wrongdoing entirely.
So what stops me from giving up this habit for the fear of Allah (سبحانه و تعالى)? My lack of patience and ingratitude. Every slight thing about someone that I find not to my liking has to be discussed and communicated with another person. That too to multiple people at many times! It is belief in Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) and a sound heart that can enable a person to deal with tough situations without showing negative reactions and turning to other mortal beings for support. The result of back biting is really nothing good as it only adds to our anger and frustration and we collect sins as well. When Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) is the First One we turn to we won’t need to knock as many doors. A famous poet penned this beautifully in a couplet:
Who aik Sajjdah jissay tou Giran Samajhta hay
Hazar Sajjdon say daita hay Admi ko nijaat
Translation: The one prostration (before God) that you find tough
Really saves you from thousands of prostrations (before many)
It is a huge step to pen down a resolution for the pleasure of Allah(سبحانه و تعالى) and I
pray that my niyyah (intention) stays pure and Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) accepts my effort and enables me to succeed in my ambition. Ameen.